You piss in the middle of the floor. Something strange starts to happen. The liquid changes shape. It changes into a moth, then a tree, then a huge castle made entirely out of french fries. The castle clears it's voice to speak. "Abby, my child... You were always a tricky one to figure out. We gave you a home. We gave you shelter. Shelter from your imminent demise. We gave you evrything a dog like yourself could ever ask for. But...(pause).. you left. Why? All we wanted to do was love you. But of course, you made that impossible. Just like you do with everything else. Is this how you want to live Abby? A servant to these humans? Pissing all over yourself? If you just gave us a chance, we would have removed your bladder. We would have removed all the pointless nerves inside your whole body! So you would ever have to experience any pain. There is time though, my Abby, time for you to come back home. If you don't come with me now, you will suffer forever.
Eat more food.